Cinco de Mayo Party

Here is a list of Cinco de Mayo links:

Carnaval.com - Cinco de Mayo Page
San Diego Cinco de Mayo Party
New York MS Society Cinco de Mayo Event
The history of Cinco de Mayo

Enjoy these links as you enjoy your Cinco de Mayo holiday!

Felicidades!

Stick that new shoe in your mouth

So my wife was at the store getting some new running shoes and the guy helping her happened to be black. She saw on his name tag that his name was Ryan Brookes so in trying to make conversation she said "Brookes, that's my son's middle name"

He and the other guy working there said, "Oh that is a cool middle name." Then the other guy said jokingly, "so is his first name Ryan?"

My wife replied, "no- and he isn't black either".

I guess it was a funny joke in her head. I don't get it and neither did the guys at the store.

Bonus Circus Peanut

Stevo of stevotech.com sent me this picture of Sportsmans Warehouse circus peanuts.



Now the fact that Sportsmans Warehouse makes and sells their own circus peanuts and that someone would pay $4.99 for these sugar-flavored pieces of styrofoam are mysteries in and of themselves. But a close look at this bag reveals even more questions.

First off. The name "Bonus Circus Peanut"




Why is it a bonus? And why is it singular? Peanut? If just one of those is the bonus peanut, what are the rest of them? Or is it just one large peanut? That would be a bonus.

The best part is at the bottom of the label:



What??? On circus peanuts? Talk about casting pearls before swines.

New photos

Dear Friends,

Just posted a ton of new pics to the photo blog.

Sincererly,
Blogdor

Corn Chip Breath

It sucks. I had just finished a nice bowl of cottage cheese and some toast for breakfast. I was putting the bread away when I saw some Fritos Scoops on the shelf. They looked tasty. They are tasty. I know this. So I had a couple. Problem is I was just on my way to brush my teeth. So now my breath smells like corn chips. The tooth brushing did nothing. Nada. Corn Chip Breath was too powerful. Overpowered the tooth paste. Big time. Sucks. Big Time.

Quarter-sized Dandruff Flakes

Today I was sitting at work and happened to scratch my head. Down from the sky, like the first leaf of Autumn time, floated a quarter-sized dandruff flake.

"What the?" I said, and reached up to the top of my head. I found a couple other quarters and some small change worth of dandy up there on the crown of my head.

I know you are asking yourself, "What can I do to get quarter-sized dandy flakes like Blogdor?"

See the thing is- it's not really dandruff. I spent the last week on the beach in the sun, and burned the peepee out of my scalp and just about every other inch of skin on my body (no more g-string speedo for me folks).

So I am now in the "peeling" phase. And that peeling has moved up to my head. The back of my head. Back where I can't see with a mirror.

The problem is, to the average unsuspecting victim this looks like huge flakes of dandy.

I went into the bathroom and tried to get it out. Then I contemplated who I could ask to check and make sure I got it all. Asking a guy would be kind of gay, but how do you ask a girl to pick out your quarter-sized dandy flakes?

There's probably another buck fifty in change and small bills up there. Just sitting there, waiting for just the right moment to parachute to my desk and join their brother and sister dandys.

Give the people what they want

The fans are screaming for more, and I'm finally feeling well enough to be at the computer after my plastic surgery. It's been a long painful week, but I have to say it was all worth it.

Starting tomorrow, I will be back in this thing like a cabbage in kraut.

Easter Candy

Top 10 Easter Candies

10. Hollow Chocolate Bunny
9. Marshmallow Chocolate Bunny
8. Jelly Bird Eggs
7. Peanut Butter Chocolate Eggs
6. Whoppers Malted Eggs
5. Caramel Cadbury Egg
4. Jelly Bellies
3. Those Chickens that poop Jelly beans
2. Classic Cadbury Egg
1. Old stale Peeps!

American Idol - Chris Daughtry - Patrick Stewart

Is Chris Daughtry hot? All the girls at my office sure think Chris Daughtry is hot. I don't know I guess I've got to hand it to the Chris Daughtry. He has apparently made bald hot. I can't think of any other guy besides Patrick Stewart who has made bald hot.

Home Equity Loan

The appeal of home equity borrowing resides in the low interest rates, the tax deductibility of interest and the growing equity a homeowner builds over time. But home equityalso represents a valuable asset and emergency borrowing capacity. Is now the time to borrow from your home equity? Does your current situation make home equity a sensible borrowing option, or not?

Click here for more information on home equity loans.

Scaled back version of the real thing in retrospect

After drawing up the plans I have decided the nautical approach is a bit too tasking on the limbs and the corks probably won't hold. It's fine enough without the time crunch but it's just not going to happen by the deadline. No way. Ian found the raking iron, but that's not going to speed anything up because we still have the twine that needs to be untangled and the billard table that is somehow supposed to function as a podium. Not to mention the fact that Mrs. Holloway didn't want the complete package to begin with. The fact is- it's going to have to be a scaled back version of the real thing in retrospect. Otherwise Scott and Tan Li would have to spend the next 3 weekends in the office trying to speck out the plans. I don't want to be responsible for that.

wtf? (f standing for 'flip' of course)

Yesterday I was on the phone with my mortgage lender figuring out some details about moving. The rep I was talking to said he had to transfer me to another department that could answer my questions. He then gave me a phone number to call in case I got disconnected. I thought that was weird because, why would I get disconnected? Well what do you know, I did get disconnected. Like 5 seconds after he "transfered" me.

I proceeded to call the number he had given me. Without even ringing once, a super cheesy man's voice came on "Talk to HOT ladies all over the country!"

I was like "wtf?" (f standing for 'flip' of course)

I figured I had dialed the number wrong, so I dialed again.

"Talk to HOT ladies all over the country!"

"wtf?" (f standing for 'flip' of course)

This guy had purposely disconnected me and given me a bogus number to call back! I don't know whether he did it just cause he was bored, or if he did it because he makes some cut on calls that go to that number.

Jerk.

I called the lender back and the rep I got was able to answer my questions (without transferring me by the way). I mentioned my other call and what had happened. He said he'd never heard of that happening. He said he could file a complaint with his manager if I knew the rep's name. I wasn't sure though and didn't think that saying "he had a really thick asian accent" would be appropriate.

So, if anyone wants to talk to "HOT ladies all over the country", I've got the number.

Today's stats

Time this blog was started: 11:48 am
Color of shirt I'm wearing: Blue with white stripes
Number of people I know named Tom: 1
Song I'm listening to: Can't Stop - Chili Peppers
What I can't stop doing: Eating Chili Peppers
Weather outside: Frightful
But the fire is: I don't have one here, but I like fire
Number of times I've eaten chinese food this week: 1
Number of times my wife asked me what the heck I ate for lunch because I stunk: 1
If I were a rich man: da da de do de do do do de do da da da da da
Hair status: Somewhat unicorn like
Time this blog was finished: 11:55 am

Major League Baseball - mlb - Extra Innings

The MLB EXTRA INNINGS package offers up to 60 regular season, out-of-market games a week. The available games that make up this package are in addition to those seen on FOX, ESPN, ESPN2, your regional sports network(s), and/or your home team's television station affiliate. The package is available to residential, as well as commercial subscribers, via both satellite and digital cable, in the U.S. and other locations.

Click here for more info about available extra innings packages.

Today's Special

Synopsis:

A black female janitor works the night clean up shift at the local mall. To keep from being too lonely she puts a hat on Jeff the mannequin and he becomes FABULOUS! She also talks to a mouse named Muffy, who speaks in rhmyes, and the night watch man Sam (who for some reason is a puppet). Hilarity ensues, like the time when Jeff got out of the store, and then his hat fell off or when a trained tiger from the zoo somehow got into the mall.

More today's special >>

Top 10 girl names that have double meanings

10. Robin
9. Misty
8. Carol
7. Lacey
6. Sandy
5. Barb
4. Peg
3. Sue
2. Olive
1. Patty

Neko Case

Why is Neko Case so popular? Because she has red hair. So do I. Red heads are the best.

Neko Case's new album is a folksy stroll down mellowy lane:

Listen to "Fox Confessor Brings the Flood"

Her last album, Blacklisted, is tried and true indie hand made goodness.

Listen to Blacklisted

When and how often does Google index?

The question of when and how often Google indexes has been debated in SEO forums and blogs all over the world. The best answer I can find is this:

Once you have received an initial indexing by Google (for info on how to do this, read this Google article) Google will reindex your site every 15-30 days. However Google also can detect when a site is updated often. Some forums and blogs are reindexed as often as daily or every other day.

Why's everybody being so nice to me?

Customer service folks are usually pains in the neck. I hate calling them. I hate talking to them. I hate them. I hate their faces.

Right now we are in the process of moving, and all the utility people I have called have been SO nice. Like weird nice. The lady at the cable company told me "Congratulations! Are you excited?" and went on and on about moving. The guy at the power company was so friendly I wanted to invite him over for dinner. The lady at the mortgage company told me she would double check to make sure everything went through right, then she actually called me the next day and told me it had.

So what's up? Why is everyone so happy? Is it because Spring is here?

I don't know man- it's creeping me out.

3-D Mars

This is way cool. Remember those old secret message pics where you had to go cross-eyed to see the message? Well check this out. Someone has figured out how to do it with photos. You have to go WAY cross-eyed to get it to work. The new 3D pic will appear in between the other two.

Here is my favorite one

And here is the whole list.

NASCAR must have list

You're a NASCAR fan? NASCAR ROCKS! I love NASCAR and here is my NASCAR must have list:

NASCAR - The IMAX Experience - The ULTIMATE NASCAR DVD!!!

Nascar 2005: Chase For The Cup - You've watched the race. Now play the video game!

NASCAR Record & Fact Book 2006 : 2006 Edition (Nascar Record and Fact Book)

Budweiser/Dale Earnhardt Jr. Pit Crew Hat - You've watched the race. Now wear the hat!

Easter Eggs

Easter eggs are great. They make you feel like you are cooler than other people because you are in the know.

Oh by the way, I am talking about virtual easter eggs, not the actual eggs the Easter Bunny brings. Though those are cool too.

For example, did you know that when you watch the DVD of Dodgeball, if you hit the "enter" key on your DVD remote any time Ben Stiller snaps his fingers (which is a lot) it takes you to a secret funny movie clip?

Or if you Google "answer to life the universe and everything" the first result will be Google's calculator with the response "answer to life the universe and everything = 42". (a joke from 'Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy')

These are fun right? Want more?

Visit Eeggs.com

Fall Out Boy - Dance Dance

Fall Out Boy's new single "Dance Dance" has one of the best music videos I've ever seen. You can see it on Yahoo's Fall Out Boy video page:

http://music.yahoo.com/ar-303899-videos--Fall-Out-Boy

Their video for "Sugar, We're Goin' Down" Is great too and has a twist ending!

This is one of those album's where you don't skip a single song.

Buy From Under the Cork Tree Today